time to update (:

So, it's been a while since I have blogged, so I guess it's time for an update, but first I must read what I have posted recently :DD

Okay, so, I have given up on the college scholarship to play soccer at AB, for Morgan. If I did that she would have to be in daycare a lott, and she doesn't like that. She has been so much happier since she is home everyday with me. She's actually turned into my girl since school is over, she was Nana's girl during school. The other night she was crying and throwing a fit, usually when she does that I give her to my mom, she can usually get her to calm down. So, I carried her tom my molm and she tok her for a few minutes and she couldn't get her to calm down, so she told me to come and get her. All she wanted was her mommy, me, that gave me a good feeling knowing that I can make everything better for her.
When we were busy rearranging furniture the other night she was fussing, so I took her to my mom, then my mom yelled for me to come get her, as soon as I walked into the room she stopped crying. She just wanted to be with me. That gives me a great feeling. I love her so much. I can't believe she's gonna be 5 months old soon.

We had a court hearing Wednesday, it went good. Morgan's "father" ordered DNA. So I guess that it will go from there. I know she is his baby though, there is no one else it could be, so I'm not worried. I'm not sure how long everything will take, hopefully not too long though..

I thought that Tyler was going to come over for a while today, but he didn't. His phone is out right now so I haven't talked to him. I wish I could though..

So my mom was cleaning out her closet upstairs and found some old tapes. She had one and it had my cousins on it, cousins I didn't even know existed. She told me their names and I said I am gonna go facebook them :D So I looked them up and my cousin Trever and I talked a little bit, he seemed really excited to hear from me. He said he remembered my brother Jonathon, but didn't know about us. So hopefully him and Josh--his brother can drive up here sometime and we can meet them :) I'm stoked!!!! :D

People

Some people just irk me. I hate the way a lot of people carry themselves, meaning the way they dress, the way they act towards other people, things like that can make a huge impression on a person.
I was just on facebook, and someone liked the little thing that says "they're called skinny jeans, not MAKE you skinny jeans" I rolled laughing almost. The girl that liked it is kinda fatt, and she wears jeans that would be too small for her. her legs aren't fatt, but her upper half is, and I hate it, it's dusgusting, she's annoying, and hardly no one likes her. But anyway...new topic...

So, Calvin met someone that he likes, her name is Hillary, she doesn't want to date, they are just friends right now, but I can tell that calvin wants it to be more. He asked me how I would feel about that. I told him that at this point in my life, I am happy, and if he went out with her and was happy, I would be happy for him, and I would be. I would be super happy for him. I am finally getting over him, and I think it would be great if he went out with that girl. She's his age, and she works at Kroger, so I think they would make a good match. lol I would be happy though.

Tyler was supposed to come over the sevening, but he didn't so I'm a little upset, but I'll get over it I guess. I'm so glad that the only thing wrong with his back is a pulled muscle, I really was worried about him. I was afraid he might have to have surgery, but its just a pulled muscle. I've recenlty been talking to Pat Mcginnis, he's a college soccer coach from AB. I'm actually looking at getting a scholarship to go and play soccer at AB. I will just have to build up my endurance and stuff, cause I suck at running, and they run a LOTTT each day. They run 6-8 miles each practice, so on two a days, that would be 12-16 miles. so I deff need to start running...like..soon. I have 2 years to build up my endurance so, we'll see how it goes...

Military, life, ugh....

So Calvin says that he's going to join the military, I don't like it too well, but I guess it's a fact of life. The reason I don't like it is because I know that he won't be around AT ALL for a while, and I won't get to see him at all. And honestly. I do still wanna be friends with him. I liked our friendship that we had. I miss it. I don't want Tyler to go into the military either. He talks about going to the Air force occassionally, like Josh, but I don't want him to, that wouild involve him being gone for a longg time, coming hoe for two weeks, then leaving again. and I wouldn't get to be with him much at all, I would hate that. But if he does decided to do that, then I'll support him. I'll always support him in whatever he does, well, unless it's like something illegal like selling cocaine or shooting up. lol
Right now he has 3 different pain meds for his back, they called him the smorning to come back to the hospital for more x-rays, they don't really know what's wrong with it. They now think that it's something with his spine. I told him that his first mistake was going to Braxton Hospital. But actually, his first mistake was putting it off and not letting anyone know the extent of how bad it actually hurt. I don't like to see him in pain like that, it worries me. I'm afraid that he's going to have to have back surgery. :(
But on a better note, I saw him today, at pizza hut, we had a soccer thingy. I scrunched my hair, he told me I looked beautiful. I love hearing that, more than I like being told that I'm "hott", "sexy" and etc......... but yeah, time to go back to facebook, so goodnight people of blogspot, whom actually read my blog, I'll hit ya up later. lmao. I love me. lol

Why....?

So Tyler stayed here all weekend. But, if I was his mother, I wouldn't have let him come over Saturday evening. We had our last soccer game Saturday against Shinntson--we lost, they play superrrr rough though, we had 2 players go to the hospital, and 5 hurt. Let's see, Luke had his collar bone separated, or his shoulder, something--he went to the hospital..Logan hurt his ankle, didn't go...Micheal busted his nose open like 50 million times. I got knocked down by a ball that Jess kicked that hit me right in the face, I cried, lol. And Ty went to the hospital after the game, he only played like tne minutes, most of which was in the back. His back has been hurt since the beginning of the season, he has put it off, and now it's finally to the point where something has to be done about it...They gave him pain medicine and he has to go to physical therapy.
The only thing that worries me about him taking those pain pills is the fact that they are sooo easy to get addicted to,....not that hes a druggy, but I know.

When Calvin got his teeth cut out in December he was on pain meds, and when he quit taking them after only a few days he started having small withdrawals from them.And also my brother did. I know what pills can do to a person, and it's not good. And I would hate for that to happen. I love that boy too much. He has to double up on both his math and english next year, cause he's lazy and doesn't do his work. He can do his work, he's just too lazy. I told him that if he wants to continue to date me then he needs to buckle down and do his work and pass.

He said something about Calvin the sevening when I was talking about the pain pills, he said he wished he had overdosed on them and died. I got up set and wanted to yell at him. I asked him why he was being so mean, when he never even knew Calvin. He said that he hates him because of what he did to me, and I told him he didn't physically hurt me, and he never did anything to him. And then he said that he was sorry and he didn't mean that. I was upset, so I ws crying a little bit, so he was upset about that. So he apologized and said that he didn't mean it and that he was sorry and he shouldn't have said that cause he knows I loved Calvin, and he thinks I still do....and bla bla bla.

My mom and I talk alot about all of this stuff, we pretty much talk a bout everything, and my mom says that with neither of us(me and Calvin) being completely over it, then neither of us will ever have a good relationship. And part of me thinks she is right, I mean, Tyler and I have a greatt relationship, it could be better at times, but I'm not complaining. But part of me still thinks about how it could be, and he told me the other day he wasn't happy either. I was Calvin's first girlfriend, and sometimes I still cry when I think about us. I hate it, cause I have a boyfriend, and I should be okay by now, considering Tyler and I have been together for over two months, and it's been four months since me and Calvin broke up. So why can't I just get over it?!!!

Anyways, im tired of writing, so bye :)

bla bla bla bla

so im setting here in homeroon next to tyler, we had to do our scheduling today so we were all in the commons area alllllll dayyyy longgggg....It was boringggg, but I got to be with tyler all day. although, hw kind of upset me cause one of his friends said something and i didnt find it very funny, but Tyler laughed, and it upset me that he laughed, he shouldn't have laughed about it. What he said was rude.
But other than that my day has been pretty good. My stomach started cramping after I ate lunch, but I was starvinngggggggg, so it was worth it, I guess. hahaa.
I gave Tyler my notebook today, its filled with over a hundred pages. He's gonna read it all, I'm not sure how long it will take him to read it, hopefully not too long, cause I want it back eventually. I told him he could read it under a few conditions. 1)nobody else reads it. 2)he doesnt discuss whats in it with anyone but me. 3)I wanted some feedback from him on it.
It's my personal notebook that I write everything in, my thought, my daily schedule, my whole life, it's more personal than my blog.

I can't wait until this weekend, Ty gets to come over and stay, he'll be with me the whole day tomorrow and most of the weekend, I'm gonna miss him when school goes out, cause I won't get to see him everyday. :(
I love him so much, I love how he accepts me and Morgan, but I've talked about this 50 million times, so new topic....

I read Carissa's blog, it is wayyyy shorter than mine, like, one of my entries, is her entire blog, its crazyyyy lol. I love blogging, and reading other people's blogs. I like to know what's going on in people's lives. :D lol

But now I'm tired of typing, so bye :)